so...who ya got?


it's selection sunday. can you feel the excitement? no? then that means one of two things. one, you already can feel that this is a sports post and you've tuned me out. or two, you are like me, an alabama fan. the basketball team sent you swirling down the toilet bowl of apathy long ago and you've rarely even realized that college basketball is being played. i get it. i am with you.

but you don't have to be a college basketball fan to fill out a bracket. hell, you don't even have to like sports. you just do it because everyone in your office is doing it. you'll watch a little espn tonight or check out the team capsules online sometime tomorrow so you, too, can become an "expert" like the rest of us, and dammit, you are ready to roll!

so, the question that you have to start with is an easy one. "who ya got?" who is going to win the whole kit 'n caboodle? did you ever understand why, psychologically, it was easier to complete a maze when you were a kid if you started from the endpoint? yeah, me either. but the same retarded logic can be applied to filling out a ncaa bracket too. if you are sure of who you think (based on your own, biased, absolutely arbitrary criteria) the best team in the land is, you can start with them and work your way backwards. that's six games you don't even have to think about! what a prize!!! the rest of the pieces really, then, become to feel insignificant. because you know how your adventure is going to end, the journey there isn't nearly as overwhelming. so, "who ya got?"

what do you mean, "i don't know?"

i will be honest. i am in the same boat. "everyone's" preseason favorite, north carolina, is wildly overrated without their point guard, ty lawson, and they are still mildly overrated with him. they will not win this year. i promise you. sorry, amy. that means you aren't going to win our pool before we even start. it's sad. it's also true.

to make matters worse, espn smashed me in the face with this incredible and intimidating stat yesterday morning. not since 1968 (1968!!!) has a team lost their first game of their conference tournament and then gone on to win the ncaa's. what??? really??? they followed that up by reminding us that history, then, has already ruled out uconn, oklahoma, pitt and last year's champs, kansas. son of a bitch. out of those four, i could have legitimately seen myself picking two of them to cut down the nets. not now. not this year. what? you're going to mess with forty years worth of failure and think that your picking this or this or this or that team can break the streak? fine. you aren't going to win your pool either.

so, what now? and why so much emphasis on who wins the whole thing? don't the other 62 games matter?

not usually. i don't have the scientific data to back this up, but i can tell you from my own ten-plus years of experience with filling out brackets that i have never (never!!!) been in a pool that had been wrapped up before the three final four games were played. and usually, unless the top two or three teams in your pool all have picked the same champ, the final will be the deciding factor in who does or doesn't take away your money and/or bragging rights. having the champ right is that important. it seems easy, sure. out of the 64 teams that make the dance, there are only ever between 6 and 10 teams that have a legitimate shot of winning the last six games of their season. some years, the number is closer to between 2 and 4.

oh yeah. not to fry your brain, but this year is the exception to that rule too. i would not be surprised at all if a crazy hot 4 or 5 seed, think maybe a syracuse that is already dripping with momentum, or an arizona state, who will always have the most nba ready player on the floor no matter who they are matching up with. it probably won't happen. but this year? it could. i'm just saying.

"so, who ya got?"

don't be so impatient. that's coming. i do want to tell you that you are all cordially invited to play in our annual "friends of HUMC" pool. i'll post the link here later tonight after i've created it. no money is necessary. just thick skin, not a terribly high amount of pride nor false hopes of actually winning. who do i have? OKLA-FREAKING-HOMA!

but, you said history had already ruled them out?

fuck history. i've got nothing for it. those that dwell on history are doomed to repeat it. that's how the saying goes, right?

right?

...

whatever. best player in the country. best freshman in the country. weird looking brother. weirder looking mom. sounds like a recipe for success if you ask me. go sooners!

good luck with your bracket. come play with us!

just remember, nobody knows anything.

except me.

(update: here is the link. feel free to pass it on. the group name is "Friends of HUMC". password is "huffman". have fun!)