...so, does the metaphor still work if they've never had glasses? oh, what the hell! let's go with it!


disclaimer:

yes, absolutely i am. of course i am. who wouldn't be? i am more than stoked. i am trying to transition to "it's only the first game" mode as we speak, but i just haven't gotten there yet. if you'll excuse the hyperbole for just a minute, though, thank you. my gut reaction to last night is this. if this season, looking back five years from now, is seen as the one that alabama became ALABAMA again, marquis maze's "the non-catch" should very well go down in bama history with the same romantic hindsight as george teague's "strip that never happened". through one game, it defines everything that is and has changed from last season to this one. there was not a player on the active roster last year that makes that catch. this year? there are probably four. last year? there were zero guys on the offensive side of the ball that made defenses squirm and gameplan around. as evidenced by last night, this year bama has at least two true freshmen that may end up being gamechangers. last year? there was no mount saint cody at nosetackle. this year? holy christ. you can't really miss big number 62. last year? alabama's season picked up momentum when they hung on to beat arkansas but still let darren mcfadden run for 200 yards. this year? alabama dominated the "best running back tandem. ever" and left no doubt as to whether or not the better team actually won. it's one game. you are right. but it was one helluva game.

back to earth...

since the last time i jotted down anything here concerning the church, i was asked to consider myself as a candidate for the vacant associate pastor helper position, empty since father's day (i respectfully removed my name from the list...reasons coming in a later post...or later on in this one...who knows). also, things are beginning to get a little more hairy with the hispanic ministry congregation that is making themselves quite at home on the campus of huffman united methodist church. other than that, things are pretty much the same. we are still being urged to be "disciples in action: making and growing disciples". we are still pretty unsure, on the whole, of what the hell that means. sunday school classes are complaining about homeless people (er, bhn) dropping spaghetti on their fancy sunday school class carpet. we are in the middle of updating the entrance of our education building with a welcome and information center and painting the walls a newer shade of beige (along with an edgy, but "faaaabuuulouuuus", black trim). you know, the usual stuff.

this week we also published a letter from our bishop grouping us into a collection of churches that are failing because we "have decided to die". that's a pretty simple diagnosis i suppose. i am pretty sure putting the majority of the blame on the churches, themselves, rather than an old-time-y and outdated appointment system and infrastructure is a symptom of a greater problem. but, then again, what do i know? i guess we'll just buy into this natural church development nonsense and continue to not focus on huffman(umc), instead focusing on how other churches have benefited from buying into the "program". more to come on this as i continue to collect my thoughts...

i feel like i know what some of you must be thinking. "why so negative, kevin? damn, you're such a wet blanket. why don't you focus on the positive, you cynical bastard?" and i admit it. i am thinking the same thing. but, here's the thing. i can't think of any one thing positive, at least not one on a grand enough, corporate scale that would lend me to legitimately consider inviting one of my own friends to humc. am i missing something? is it just my bad attitude that i share only with myself? or am i onto something that is lurking right below the surface in a lot of sunday school groups and in watercooler-type conversations all around our halls that are being shared with a couple here and a couple there but still haven't reached the point of critical mass? i'd invite someone to my sunday school class, but a new member, if not forewarned with a detailed back-story, would quickly get the impression that someone is dragging us to the church in handcuffs. i would invite someone to a "church" softball game, because that event is far enough away from our sunday morning baggage and hispanic backlash that it wouldn't completely poison the "visitor's" idea of our church upon first glance. i'd invite them to walk around the church with me my one week out of every month and i could share great stories of great times that continue to fuel my want to be attached to my church, even if it's walking around the outside of it, locking the doors after everyone has left the building (um. that would probably preach.). and that's about it right now. and that's about sad.

are there other ministries in the church that are doing good things? sure. our role in bhn is still going strong. the choir is still doing their thing. the children's place has started it's bounce back from rock bottom. olga's still "the man." but shouldn't there be more? shouldn't we have an idea of why all of these ministries exist? why they should be maintained? why we should care outside of the context of "the great commision" and inside the context of how we should be serving our community in the year 2008? of course we should.

but, we don't. and that, dear bishop, is why we are in decline. do not question our effing commitment! it is vision we lack. it is vision that we crave. it is vision and the mission that follows that vision that will lead us back to where we once were. to life. to caring again. to relevancy. and that relevancy, that vision starts with the head of our church, local. and that starts with you, bishop, the man responsible for feeding our heads of our churches this natural church development bullcrap.

huffman, it is not you that i am upset with. i completely agree with what sarah stated as we were processing how this morning fit into huffman's greater problems. our system is killing us. the caretakers of our system are failing. and there is no one, currently, that can hear our screams. i love being a methodist. in theory, there is something beautiful and fluid and accountable about the beliefs and ideas and ideals that define us. currently, we are not operating like a methodist church.

and that, chip, is my "big idea". it's not new. it's not revolutionary. it is what it is.

i want us to be methodist again. i want us to understand the love of jesus through the way we see our defined graces. i want us to tithe to our system, our idea. i want us to be ok with the appointments we receive because we are, by definition, welcoming and flexible. i want us to be open-minded and open-hearted and open-door-ed. i want us to be able to see the forest and not just the hispanics trees. i want these things for my church. i want them for myself.

our bishop would tell you he wants these things too. so would our senior pastor. and our two senior pastors before that. and they might mean those words. but their actions indicate to me (in my most humble and definitely could be wrong opinion) that their idea of what and who we are has been corrupted somehow. perverted. altered. skewed. and until someone convinces me that i missed the chapter on revitalizing grace, i will believe this.

the good news is that i am ready to write about church again. the bad news is that there is (close to) nothing good to report.

yet.

there are still good people at huffman. the confusion in the air is dense, though. and the forecast is for more of the same. what to do? either "they" change or we change and then we change them (damn, that sounds familiar). it's our move.

but then again, it always has been.

to be or not to be

(julio)

if you didn't see this post coming, well, welcome to my planet. my name is kevin o'kelley. i like alabama football. too much at times. my like is not unconditional, mind you. i find it harder to care when the team stinks (like the braves). i find it harder to play fanatic when a season's potential has been lost to a bad john parker wilson interception (or a chipper jones injury). i find it hard to swallow that even a probation-era-handcuffed alabama has lost to auburn six consecutive years. i know if alabama had kept it's nose clean that the whole "one for the thumb" nonsense never would have happened. hell, it never even would have been imagined. that's not to say that auburn would not have beaten alabama on the field in that span of six years. i am saying that, recruiting being on a level playing field, alabama doesn't lose six straight. but alabama didn't keep it's nose clean. and it was punished for it. it's a shame that institutional control is such a hard bear to tame, but when people care about a program (and it staying on top) like i care about alabama and those people have lots of money, the temptations to skirt the rules will always be around. here's hoping nick saban hammers those temptations down as hard as he does the every so often unsuspecting media joe that asks a silly question. my like, my love even, is not unconditional. i am a fairweather fan, including when it comes to those teams that i love the most. my like is not unconditional.

but my hope is.

and my hope (along with many other bama fans) is currently personified in one julio jones.

let's look at the facts.

julio...

...was first team parade magazine prep all-america.

...was first team ea sports prep all-american

...was scout.com prep all-american

...was rivals.com number one ranked high school prospect, state of alabama, in 2007.

...was rivals.com number four ranked high school prospect, country of usa, in 2007.

...was espn.com number two ranked high school prospect, country of usa, in 2007.

...attended the under armour prep all-american game.

...announced his decision to attend the university of alabama on february 6, 2008.

...was announced as starting wide receiver for the university of alabama on august 25, 2008.

the julio jones era at the university of alabama has now arrived. buckle. your freaking. seatbelts!

i can only imagine what it would be like to be even one person's hope personified. what an amazing weight that must be to carry. i don't know this young man. i've only seen him play once, and that was against over-matched high school competition. but i know what he means to every alabama fan that sees his being in tuscaloosa as the turn towards something completely new and completely traditional all at the same time. he means everything.

i've said this before, but today's announcement that julio would be starting come saturday night only further cements my theory. even if julio tears his acl on the way to the bus headed towards the georgia dome and never plays a down or never catches a pass or never becomes the first round pick he's destined to be doesn't matter now. what matters is that his signing and being on campus and living up to the hype (in saban's eyes) to the point of him starting on day one means the ball has bounced in a different direction. it means that one of the best players in the country picked alabama. and it opens the gate for other best players to follow his footsteps. it will now be up to saban, julio, the current team, future teams and the program, itself, to keep the momentum running in a positive direction, but make no mistake. alabama is again trending towards the top.

auburn fan or georgia fan or florida fan or tennessee fan or lsu fan can jeer now, sure. alabama is, absolutely, still below them on the totem pole that is the sec. but any fan of those schools that tells you or themself that they didn't shudder on the day that julio said he was coming is either lying or doesn't pay enough attention to matter. either one's a shame. for several years, alabama has been sliding down a mountain of ice shredding their nails to the quick trying to stop their own proverbial snowball from making it's way down the hill to irrelevancy. with his signature and arrival, julio, single-handedly stuck his pick in the glacier and said, "this is far enough. now, we head back up." for one young man, uniquely gifted in the athletic field that he has chosen, that is pretty damn impressive. enjoy this year, sec. maybe enjoy one more. barring alabama kicking themself in the teeth again anytime soon, the view at the top is about to be tinted crimson.

i can only imagine what it would mean to be one person's hope personified. if i play my cards right, though, i could very well be two. two little girls, one that turned one year old on saturday and one that inspired me to start this site, will one day look at me and their mother as the model for how they respond when they happen into a crummy situation(s). if i play my cards right, they will choose wisely and they will come out better persons for having made it through their crummy situation(s). that must and will be a heavy burden to carry. i suppose i am ready.

i can't dream of being like julio jones on the football field. not now. not ever. he is fast and athletic and an already great catcher of footballs. i am not.

i can dream of being someone's hope. hell, i can dream of being a lot of people's hope. shoot for the stars, right? and to that end?

to be or not to be julio?

i choose "to be."

so long as we are pimping alabama freshmen...

rolando mcclain, meet jerrell harris. jerrell, rolando. while prince hall figures out ways not to get himself into anymore trouble, jerrell will be your new best friend. he isn't quite as big as you are. yet. but he's every bit as talented. he's a hard worker. he likes to hit people. and he's beyond tired of reading everyone and their mother write about alabama's weakness at linebacker. that's right. he reads too. consider him worth molding in your likeness. if alabama is to succeed this fall, he needs to follow your footsteps onto the all-sec freshman team.

in other news...

yesterday, i had the roughest day of work that i've had in quite some time. i am usually not one to complain about my job. most days, it's not nearly labor intensive enough that my complaining would come across as anything more than whining. but then again, it's not every day that i am sick either. and yesterday, i was pretty sick. it didn't help matters that i was incredibly sore from the previous night's softball double-header, so i began the day thinking that i'd loosen up as the day went along and things would be just fine. about mid-morning, i started getting that ominous hot/cold/hot/cold feeling that accompanies any good-for-something fever. sure enough, by lunchtime, i felt wretched. i didn't want to move. i didn't want to talk. i just wanted to go home and lay down. but i couldn't. not yet. why? because there was over 3200 pounds of cat litter in my backroom that needed to come out onto the floor. i could've been a little baby and let my stocker do all of it by himself, but that's not really how i roll. so, after i ate a small lunch, we went to the back to lift the equivalent weight of his volkswagon jetta twice (once off the pallet, once onto the floor) in processed clay so that my customers could have the on-sale scooping cat litter they so rightfully deserve. after finishing up that project, i felt like i could've cried. my fever made my head ache and feel as if it were swollen to twice it's normal size. junk oozed down the back of my throat. my neck hurt. my hamstrings were on fire from the up and down and up and down. i was miserable. i finally got away from the store and made it home in time to not die. i took some tylenol and drifted in and out of nap sleep as i felt my fever begin to break for the first time all day. such a wonderful and disgusting feeling all at the same time. the pain from the day was being released, but it was coming out my sweat glands in such a way that i was worried i could ruin the couch with the amount of water that was coming out of me.

i just laid there until the girls got home. by that time, i felt close to human again. i had endured what i hope to be the worst part of this cold or whatever that i am fighting off. i say all the time that i am the worst about being sick. all i want is for someone to take care of me (bring me soup, warm washcloth on the forehead, etc.). yesterday, though, i was proud of myself. i stuck out the day, came home and took care of myself, and wasn't the altogether nuisance that i usually am. maybe that's the way it's gotta be now. two baby girls in the house make it hard for me to get undivided attention even if i needed it.

i don't usually like to complain about my job or my life when i have so much less to complain about than so many others. i'll complain a little about yesterday, though. but i am glad that it ended well. and i am glad that i feel a little better today.

less than two weeks away from football

(oh, yeah. and i get to see my friends again.)

listen, there is no way that i can articulate the excitement and enthusiasm that is currently building inside of me for the college (and pro) football season to get rolling, pun intended. the braves' season is over. bobby cox is still trying to "win games", blowing out 42 year-old pitcher's elbows in the process, instead of using the last forty games as extended spring training for 2009. i am appreciative of the olympics for serving as a dramatic and, at times, compelling bridge to get me to aug. 30th (count me among the phelps fanatics). but, let me be honest. the first game of the season for alabama followed by week one of the nfl fantasy football year is what's keeping me up at night. god, i cannot wait.

also exciting is that, barring something unforeseen, come aug. 30th., i actually get to hang out with andy and kiker again. softball has given me a built-in excuse to keep track of kiker over the summer, but, as hard as it is to believe, i haven't actually kicked it with andy since before drew's baseball season began. how on earth did this happen??? i'll tell you how. andy went 9-5 on my ass (actually, i think it's something ungodly like 6-2) and took himself out of the running for easy-access, "hey, do you want to go to dreamland" spectaculars that we used to work out from time to time. and what did i do to combat that obstacle thrown in our way? um. i guess i just whined about it. fat lot of good that did me.

for my lack of effort leading up to the renewal of our gatherings come this time two weeks from yesterday, to my friends, i apologize. i hope that part of our pre-game conversation can include steps to prevent this sort of long-time absence from happening again any time soon. call me gay or sappy or whatever, but, damn, i miss you guys. it's been too long.

this serves as just another testament to the possibility that julio jones (no disrespect to bj, pictured above) is the savior of all mankind. even in the midst of two-a-days, your promise of "something better" can keep old friendships aflame.

god bless you, julio.

when good blogs go bad


i am looking at you, joseph. donna. jacob. brian. sometimes andy. i am looking at your extinct blogs, kiker and chris perry. and i am looking at you for one reason. all of your blogs (or lack thereof) drive me crazy. don't get me wrong. i love your posts. every last one of them. from ipod playlists to talking about tea to ranting about law firms to designing weird stuff that my brain could never imagine to killdozers. i love them all! and that is my point. there aren't enough of them!

i guess there are as many reasons that blogs are created as there are blogs, themselves. the root of all them (or at least part of the root) stemming from the want or, in some cases, need to share some part of "you" with THE REST OF THE WORLD (or the three people you think may read your blog). you don't see your friends enough and want to create some outlet for conversation or community? start a blog. you want to jot down thoughts that you usually keep inside so that maybe your daughter(s) might understand you a little better when they are older? start a blog. you feel like you are an expert on a given subject and it is your calling to share that expertise with THE REST OF THE WORLD? start a blog. you want to journal and your pen is out of ink? start a blog. you want to feel that someone hears you other than yourself? start a blog. you want to bash someone but don't have the balls to say it to their face? start a blog. you want something that you feel like you and no one else has control over it's content, the "it's my blog/world" concept? start a blog. you like to read books and then watch movies made from books and then talk about how the book is better than the movie or vice-versa and why? start a blog. the list could go on and on and there is absolute merit to every reason that anyone could come up with i suppose. one would hope that a blog's creation would not be born out of malicious intent, but those are out there too. and the people that started those blogs would probably have pretty good, if not reasonable, arguments for them. blogs are created for hundreds upon thousands of reasons.

the reasons that blogs are maintained, though, are significantly fewer. the internet is littered with a drastic number of dead blogs walking. link after link of old livejournals, blogspots, wordpresses, among others that have been left with nothing more substantial anymore than a permanent internet address. they have been abandoned. the reason behind their creation long since forgotten. and they stand as little more than a polaroid of some person's life when they thought using their disposable time putting finger to keyboard and sharing thoughts for THE REST OF THE WORLD to see seemed like a worthwhile effort. happening across these url's make me sad. i think to myself, "what a waste." i wonder what happened that this person stopped writing. did they piss somebody off? did they run out of time? did they grow out of the exercise? did someone call them a pansy? did they get a real job? did they never really like to write in the first place?

in most cases, that's what it really boils down to, right? getting some enjoyment from writing down your own thoughts for posterity's sake. taking a step further than trusting your long term memory to remind you why "this" was important on "that" day. chances are that you are going to enjoy your posts way more than anyone else. why? because they are your thoughts. yours and yours alone. you always will be more invested than your readers, and that should be ok. because if you are blogging, you are writing for yourself, right? you hope to enlighten or entertain or educate your readers along the way, but, in the end, it's for you.

and some people just don't have it in them. to write. to find time to write. some people learn that they'd rather communicate in a more direct or old school manner like the phone, or worse, in person. pshh. how dated are they? and that's ok too. i don't judge them (harshly).

why those mentioned above drive me crazy is because i am guilty of raising my expectations of them. and lowering my expectations of myself.

they blogged once!!! that must mean they'll blog all the time. and since i miss them and want to know what is going on in their world all the time but don't feel like i have the time (or sometimes energy) to pick up the phone and call them or go to dreamland with them or travel to florida to see them, this will make it easier for ME. i won't have to try as hard. i won't have to worry about how they are doing because they are going to let me know in no fewer than bi-weekly posts and i can still feel like i am connected to them even though i am doing very little to further the cause of our relationship myself.

they didn't do anything wrong. they all have families and jobs and school and things that are more important to them than their blog. so do i. but, then again, i am pretty narcissistic. i really like reading my own thoughts. why else would i spend a lazy off day posting three times? it's not like i am being paid by the word. it's not like i couldn't find something more constructive to do around the house (even though i would have cut the grass today if it wasn't raining). this makes me happy. the writing. and the reading. and the thinking about what i'll jot down next.

good blogs don't really go bad. i just miss my friends sometimes. and my family. and sometimes i am too tired to do anything about it other than type.

today was a good day for me. thanks for sharing.

ok. so, i am starting to get pretty excited.

i've been waiting a long time for this.

this is what four million dollars a year looks like, folks. it's not the record last year. it may not be the record this year. it's this photo. it's the stories, like jesus julio jones', that are pumping out of tuscaloosa this month. that this year's recruiting class could put 8-10 young (fresh)men in meaningful situations come the clemson game. one could argue that playing 10 freshmen is a good sign of a bad program, and i hear that argument. but one could also argue that alabama hasn't had 10 freshmen worth playing during their first year on campus in twenty years.

let's face it. alabama's schedule this season is brutal. they bookend the campaign with top-ten challenges (if auburn holds up their end). they go to georgia. they go to lsu. 8-4 means they don't trip on their way to taking care of the rest of their business outside of these games. maybe they pull an upset. maybe two. maybe they don't crap a gimme game away this year. it's all up in the air at this point, obviously.

but this picture is what four million dollars a year looks like, because if mike shula or somebody else not named nick saban is coaching the tide, this guy is probably catching passes from tim tebow or drew weatherford this year. and that is a fact my opinion.

god bless you, julio (and burton and jerrell and mark and mark and tyler and others). crimson and white suits you (all) quite nicely.

how i got old


today used to be a holiday for me. i'd wait with anticipation. i'd soak in all the commercials. i'd get excited months ago when the cover boy was announced. i'd play a little ncaa to whet my appetite. i wouldn't go so far as to be at wal-mart at midnight, but sometime during the day of release, i would pick up the newest version of madden. and i would play. for hours on top of hours i would play. just exhibition games, mind you. i wouldn't start a full season until (real) pre-season games were over and done with. and then it was on. my first season would be with the falcons. that would take all of a week. then i'd play a season with whichever team i was all about at the time. then i'd draft a fantasy team and play a bizarro season. rinse. and repeat.

then i got old.

then i went and did something stupid like give away my playstation. and since christmas of 2006, i haven't picked up a gaming controller. every year, around this time, i start to get "the itch" again. it's like a drug. at some point, i can't remember when, the playstation memory card would keep track of how much time one spent playing the games that you were using the card with. i wish i could remember the year and the specifics of my most ridiculous tally, but i can't. if i had them in front of me, i'd either be really ashamed or really proud. probably the latter.

most days, it's easy to rationalize not having a system. since the day i gave my playstation 2 away, i've been telling myself that i wouldn't have enough time in any given day to justify the cost of having a ps3. most days, i trust that judgement to be the best for myself and my family. i am sure the girls appreciate (even if they don't know that they do) my rational (and "grown-up") side having matured. on days like today, though, when everyone on espn is talking about madden and i remember how much a part of my life during the football season it used to be, i get kind of sad.

once the real games start, i'll get over it. i've replaced part of my yearning for that game(s) with a new one - fantasy. and that draft is only a few short weeks away.

my favorite commercial on tv right now is one that is running on espn pimping fantasy football. it's got a regular joe out in the yard talking with and high-fiving an imaginary packers running back, ryan grant, while a kid looks on wondering what the crap is going on. for a couple days, if you happen upon me sitting on the couch, staring at a tv that isn't on with an imaginary controller in my hands only to see me erupt in anger, throw down the imaginary controller and find a cat to kick (or throw)...

just let it go.

single, father of two
(back from the beach)
((hannah and caroline and me, part fifteen))



i haven't really thought of it in these terms 'til right now. beginning tonight, i'll be alone in my care of the babies girl for as many nights as we were just at the beach. weird. but, not scary. i think we will have a good time together. if night one (which is now complete with the girls tucked tightly into bed) is any indication, we'll be just fine.

so, we are back from the beach. sarah asked me what my favorite part of the trip was as we were headed back today, and the immediate answer was easy. the ocean. i could not have asked for more perfect ocean conditions than what we were handed for three consecutive days. we arrived sunday to a yellow flag, but it was a pretty rough yellow. monday and tuesday followed with red flag days, the both of them, but tame enough on the red flag scale ("5" being "people gonna die!!!" and "1" being "i can tell my mom i was dangerous when i get back") that none of our party (save hannah) feared for their safety. i splashed and dove into the oncoming waves with reckless abandon just as i remember doing as a boy. back then, i felt like the only person in the water. back then, i felt like i was the only one on the entire beach as i performed my acrobatics but i always secretly wished that people were watching me and commenting on how cool i looked. that probably didn't happen. on this trip, it was usually my brother-in-law and me tossing around a soaked nerf turbo in between waves and we both would crash into the oncoming "tacklers" as if it was what we were made to do. i like doing things that hearken back to my days as a boy. i like doing things that make me feel giddy. playing in the ocean the last three days accomplished both.

hannah and caroline were awesome and beach bunnies, themselves. hannah came a long way in a year's time. she found herself actually enjoying not only the sand on the beach, but the water too as, each passing day, she found herself more and more brave as it concerned her and the ocean. hannah also found herself underwater twice in the pool on the last day, something that she swore to us she would not let happen on the trip. both occasions were accidents, but they will provide growth looking ahead to whatever pool we hope to find ourselves in next summer. caroline was how caroline always is. easy. she chilled in the baby pool on the beach. she chilled in the pool by the hotel. she chilled in the hotel room. she fussed a little here and there, but only because her regular routine of rest and food was thrown off some by the vacation itinerary. the girls were the stars of the show as far as i could tell. hannah could be a little demanding at times with her request for control of the television and "her way", but then she would pull something sweet out of her hat and warm us all with how tenderhearted she truly is. i think the babies girl had a good time, indeed.

sarah's been hard to read. being around that side of her family plays with and triggers all sorts of emotions that i can't possibly begin to try and explain here. i will say, though, that i think she enjoyed her vacation and will take the good with the bad any day if it means that we get to go to the beach.

my emotions, given that i haven't had a ton of time to properly reflect? mixed as well. i had a great time. and i was flattered to be welcomed into that side of the family in that kind of atmosphere in a very warm (but very different) way. a lot of stuff, said and unsaid, was going on in the condo at times, but i am sure the same could be said when any family, separated by time and space, convenes in an attempt to enjoy the others' company. i felt awkward at times. i felt like i bit my tongue as much as i could (and i am proud of that). and i felt like i got closer to some folks that i wouldn't mind spending more time around. time and space will probably prevent that from happening, but, in this case, it's the thought that counts.

back from the beach.

one day now to get my head back in shape before i get back to the store. hopefully, tomorrow will feel like a good "off" day even though the vacation is over. hopefully, i can get the girls to saturday morning without them missing mommy too much. hopefully, like last year, the sour tastes that i have in my mouth will soon be replaced with something sweeter. memories of the good and healthy times that will build me and my family toward a better tomorrow. i shouldn't worry about fixing anything that's not my place to fix. i should worry about why hannah is completely perfect even though she watches "inappropriate" television.

"kevin!!!"

you're right. thanks, family crump, for a wonderful time! thank you, pre-tan, for working. and thank you, waves. see you next summer, ok? don't forget me. i love you.

to the beach!
(hannah and caroline and me, part fourteen)


so, things will be shutting down around HACAM for a few days, for the the family o'kelley is about to head to the (orange) beach! i must say, it feels like a well-deserved vacation, but the more i think about it, the more "deserved" feels like a pretty relative term. every one of us deserves a vacation, don't we? i don't know if i would go so far as to belittle myself as a slacker, so i won't say that people work harder than i do. but, i do know that there are tons of people that work in much worse conditions than i do. outside. no air-conditioning. less down time. less friendly people to work with. those people probably "deserve" a vacation more than i do.

since our beach trip last year, though, i have been robbed at my store twice. dealt with the fallout of two more robberies at the store, those two of which i was lucky enough not to be around. most recently, i am dealing with the alleged idea that two of my employees have been active and willing participants in taking money (away from the store) that doesn't belong to them. in addition to work stuff, we've added a new baby caroline to our mix and we've been dealing with a no-longer-baby hannah that is developing her own stubborn personality that matches quite honestly with those of her parents. there have been good times. there have been bad. such is probably the case with every family i suppose.

all of this is to say that i don't feel guilty for getting away for a few days. quite the contrary. i think it is going to be a healthy experience to leave huffman and decompress for a while. try not to think about the store. or fielding a softball team. or cutting the grass. or washing clothes. or all other kinds of stuff.

all of this is to say that i can't wait for tomorrow morning. come fourteen hours from now, i'll be on vacation. leave a message if you'd like. there's a pretty good chance that it won't be returned 'til thursday.

take care, all.