hannah and caroline and my sick one kidney


well, it's been a heavy month, yeah? at the beginning of july, i was on antibiotics for what my primary care physician coined a "really bad infection". two days after beginning the antibiotic, the only symptom that has presented itself throughout this entire endeavor began to clear up...only to come back a few days later.

and then the trip to see a urologist, dr. wade. i was with him for less than an hour, but the news he shared with me would change my outlook on life, if not my actual life, forever. a mass, now confirmed to be malignant, was found growing inside my right kidney.

whoa.

three weeks later, i find my way to the hospital to have the kidney removed. a day later, i receive the best news possible, that the tumor is completely contained and isolated in the kidney, the cancerous cells having not even moved into the margins of the affected organ. the doctor tells us to "celebrate" the good news. we take a deep breath. we move on to recovering from the surgery, itself.

the last week has been a trying one. i have never experienced consistent pain like i have over the last seven days. i went without pain medication for the first time last night. my staples have been removed. i am still a week away from driving, probably over two from returning full time to work. i am not very good at just sitting around. my mind goes to too many dark places.

i am ready to get out of the house again. ready to spend some time with friends again. ready to play softball again (even though that's several weeks off). that being said, this week has been a unique one at home. sarah and i don't have a whole lot of time to ourselves anymore. and even though she's been playing the role of nurse, it's been good to have the time.

it's kind of sad that this weekend will mark the beginning of a return to our new normal. i won't have my first follow-up scan for three months. after recovering from surgery, it will be back to business as usual for a while. by time for my next panic attack, hannah will have started kindergarten. wow. my big girl. caroline, hopefully, will be just a little less "terrible" as she turns two. i'll eventually get back on the field. we'll be getting ready for advent and a trip to georgia for some turkey and dressing. kinda weird. life marches on. i guess it's time to get back on the train and stop feeling sorry for myself.

i hope things will be less heavy here. HACAM hasn't been a whole lot of fun over the last month. and i hate that. this is one of my truly enjoyable escapes, and i want to get back to talking some about the braves that are trying to maintain my interest and the beginning of the college football season being close enough to taste at this point.

let's face it, though. my life and this blog has now seen it's "game-changer". here's hoping that i can incorporate my and our new normal into what used to be a lot of fun around here before the kidney thing went down. there are too many good and relevant things going on in my life that will affect my girls' lives not to make note of them, right?

no more whammies.