shame on us


there isn't anything we can do about it now, but the take home message from today's service was a little sad.

"we are sorry."

not once, but twice did ruben clemente, the leader of humc's hispanic "ministry", feel as though he had to apologize on behalf of his congregation for perceived transgressions made towards the facilities we have been allowing them to use for several years.

"we are sorry our children scratched/colored on your walls."

"we are sorry that we spilled sodas on the carpets."

"again, we are sorry."

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"please stop sending me hate letters."

"we are leaving now."

"you don't have to worry about us anymore."

"good riddance."

ok, ok. the last four were made up by me and kiker, but it felt like they would have been appropriate considering the tone of ruben's choice of words.

the message that we have been sent concerning ruben's group and their departure is that they no longer felt safe in our community. and to be fair, there is a very real cultural barrier that separates hispanics and blacks in general, not just in huffman. part of that sentiment may be true. but the message that ruben delivered this morning was different.

i am paraphrasing...

"we started in your parlor. we outgrew your parlor (read: they broke something and were asked to move.). we moved into your chapel. we outgrew your chapel (read: they probably broke something in there too.). we moved downstairs into your basement. we used your fellowship hall. we used nursery and sunday school class rooms. we have baptized over forty adults in the name of christ since we have been using your building. we feel like we are doing god's work." but, we are really sorry about that one time one of our girls stuck her arm through one of your doors. we suck. and are careless. forgive us. please. don't be mad at us anymore. she is fine now, by the way. thanks for asking. lucy, show them your scar.

again, that last part is mine.

don't get me wrong. there were all sorts, and i mean ALL SORTS of communication stumbling blocks and issues with this relationship from the get-go. it took a couple years for the majority of our congregation to realize that there was, even, a group of hispanics meeting in our building. when people complained and things boiled to a head, we, collectively, chose to "support" and own the group as our hispanic "ministry", implying that we were doing them a favor by letting them use our place, but keeping them, still, at an arm's length. by that point, the damage had already been done. ruben didn't feel welcome. we weren't going out of way to make them feel welcome. he started looking around. dcd started helping them look. harris came on board and they already had one foot out of the door.

it's probably for the best. for, as vibrant a ministry as ruben may have been leading, the ministry was connected by several tentacles to the era at our church that we are now trying to lead ourselves out of. the era of trusting and then blaming the pastor for everything that goes right or wrong. the era of nobody having any idea of what anybody else is doing. the era of committees in name only. the d.i.a. era, full or something or another, but really signifying nothing. the era of longtime members looking for reasons to leave and then finding them in scapegoat drama, sunday school classes or pastors. the era that will mark, if we don't do something about it, the beginning of the end.

ruben's ministry was the last true tie to that unfortunate era. as a matter of fact, their group serves as a wonderful metaphor and cautionary tale all at the same time. the hispanic group thrived. at the same time, other good and godly things happened at our church. ministry has not ceased to exist. but each man and woman and ministry have been operating on their own island, set adrift from any central or mainland message that will always welcome our missionaries home with open arms and a singular purpose.

lessons can be learned from the aforementioned era, and we will continue to examine them in the future, hopefully in contrast to something new and improved. hopefully, in this peace and quiet that we now find ourselves in, we may discern subtle and impactful ways to do god's work. hopefully, we can figure out what we want to be as a church in the middle of a huffman community with so many needs to be filled.

and hopefully, the next time a non-member addresses a portion of our congregation to express his or her thanks for the use of our facilities, he or she won't be made to feel like stains in the youth room define their experience.