Thursday, August 06, 2009

so long, spud jr.


to those that saw it (and marveled at his owner's neglect), it wasn't pretty. but in every way it was a carwreck, one that you couldn't take your eyes off of. and yet, monday, it was removed. the tumor/cyst/whateverthecrapitwas that my oldest cat had been carrying with him for many a year took a trip to the dumpster monday afternoon. spud's not speaking to reporters on the matter yet, but i think he's a more handsome cat for it. may it increase his and our quality of life for a while. you're welcome, spud, and i am sorry for being a horrible owner.

if working at psp has taught me anything, it is that pets are a magnificent distraction to their owner's lives in good ways and bad ways. and we need magnificent distractions. all of us do.

as i try and draw out of the haze of my last month and a half, i search for my next distraction. should i read more? take up walking? let andy talk me into one of his remaining adoptable puppies? play bunko? poker? buy a ps3 and spend the fall of 2009 hearkening back to the "good old days" when i wasted hundreds of hours of my life on madden and mvp? maybe i should let chip take me hunting, acquire the taste for "the kill" and tune in with nature while waiting around in the woods for my next helpless victim to fall prey to me and whatever i would name my gun...most likely "keyser soze". i need and am searching for something. i am open to suggestions. what do you think?

i am thinking about sacred cows.

i am thinking about pink elephants.

word of life the worship center.

huffman.

east lake.

what does it mean that trussville baptist looked around at schools that they could help and decided on chalkville elementary?

why did costa's bbq on chalkville mt. not work?

what are you searching for? i am looking for something tan-gi-ble.

magnificent distractions. tangents. detours. relative, to what? exactly. if working at psp has taught me anything, it's that ak-47's are overrated. it wasn't my life that flashed in front of my eyes that night. it was a dream. a facade. things that didn't matter and won't. it was alabama football and braves baseball and ribs and softball, because he was never going to shoot. at least, that's what i tell myself now.

looking down the barrel of that tumor, i didn't and don't see distractions. i did and do see sarah, and hannah and caroline and kiker and andy and my brother(s) and my family and my friends that i could go weeks without seeing or talking to but don't want to anymore. i saw what's now left of my church. i saw those that have made themselves happier by leaving us. and i saw that it was all good.

if what we talked about last night was what "you" are searching for, maybe we overextended ourselves in the 80's and 90's. and this today we are living in, this moment, this is the "course correction". maybe we became something perverted from the point. a show or a soap opera with a heart of gold and good intentions, but still a show. and this today, this moment, what if we are, only now, realizing the truth.

you are spinning (out of control) the truth, no?

possibly. i've never not been stupid. i've got to think this through. why remove the questions that seem uncomfortable before you make copies? i don't know. turn around.

magnificent distractions.

2 comments:

Kathy H said...

There's lots of food for thought there- many things that could be commented on. I guess I'm thinking church these days, so that's where I'll go.

I wish I could take credit (and quote correctly, but alas, I returned the book to the library) for this, but I can't. I can only say that I maybe agree.

What I read (paraphrased) was this: We've spent the past 50-60 with full churches because going to/belonging to a church was the conventional thing to do. Now that it's becoming less conventional, we're dropping in numbers. But maybe that's a good thing, because maybe now that we've lost those who were only in church because it was the conventional thing to do, we're left with those who are there out of intention- the intention to be transformed. Now we can get to work?

Unknown said...

theres a car salesman who was interviewed on cnn who apparently thinks ak-47s are also overrated and need to be handed out with the purchase of a car from his dealership.