a pastoral prayer


something will be lost without the delivery i guess, but i liked the thought of posting my "coming back out" to the church here for posterity. keep in mind, if you would, that this isn't really a post. it's more a cut and paste. to that end, you'll have to look past all the capital letters too. i don't have the energy to go through and HACAM-ize the whole thing.

Dear Heavenly Father,

If I didn’t know any better, I would say that I didn’t deserve so much of Your attention.

My life is filled not so much with vices, but many things that have taken much of my time away from You. I love softball. And basketball. And Alabama football. I have television shows that are much higher on my priority list than Bible study. And no matter how incredible and enveloping Lost is, how much it may or may not remind me of You, it’s not the same, is it? Maybe those things are vices.

My life is filled with worry, anger and borderline hate, all bad and unhealthy emotions that on a conscious level, I am completely aware of how detrimental they are to me and my relationship with You. Subconsciously, they gnaw away at me anyway. I’ve become accomplished at using these things as motivating factors in my life, but I don’t know if they are motivating me towards good or bad. Maybe that’s for another prayer. My life is filled with worry and anger and I clutch them like they are my security blanket.

My life is filled with unresolved conflict. Conflict that has been much easier over the last who knows how many years to avoid rather than confront face to face. What makes this matter worse is that most of the conflict that keeps me up at night is with my family, my friends and my church, all of whom would benefit every bit as much as me if we could sit down and tell each other how much we love the other. For this to happen, one or both of us would have to admit that we were wrong. That, Father, is easier said than done. And so, my life is also filled with unresolved conflict and, on most days, I would have it no other way.

If I didn’t know any better, I would say that I didn’t deserve so much of Your attention.

Thanks to this church, I know better.

Father, I imagine that my skewed priorities, my unhealthy emotions and my unresolved conflict share similar stories with everyone is this holy room this morning.

What a beautiful thing a community of faith is! Countless experiences, just like ours, that we can learn from and be strong because of...together. In our Sunday school classes, we use our time-tested and Jesus-approved relationships to understand how we can better walk with You...together. In worship, we lift our voices in the best way we know how to tell You thank you for not giving up on us, at the same time acknowledging our need to know more about the way You work...together. In our mid-week studies, we admit that we are not all Biblical scholars, but are enthusiastic in our journey to learn more from scripture and from each other...together. In our outreach ministries, we own Your challenge for us to take our faith and share it with the world, no matter how anxious it makes us. We do this...together. And when we are apart, in our homes, in our jobs, in our daily lives, we are better examples of You because of the time that we spend...together.

Thanks to this church, I grow and am growing in my understanding of how blessed I am to deserve your attention.

Father, I thank you for Huffman United Methodist Church. I thank you for everyone that is here worshipping with us today. I thank you for the history that we share, the tradition that we have forged and the future we have in front of us.

We are not a voice that has forgotten how to sing. Depending on the day, we may be singing different hymns, but we are still singing.

I thank you, Father, for our church health team. The first step in solving a problem is admitting there is a problem. Our church health team has identified that, to regain our potential, we must all be singing the same hymn, moving forward together.

I thank you, Father, for our Rev. Denson and his introduction to us over these last few weeks of the Natural Church Development idea and ideals, introducing to us that before a church can grow again, we must remember what it feels like to be healthy again. Please be with Chris today as he brings us Your word. Let us be open to the idea of being transformed in your spirit, and let us be open to how we can take that message with us as we leave this place.

For those that need our prayers today, Father, we pray for them. We pray for our church. And we give thanks to every person, place or thing that has brought us together in this place at this time on this day.

We love you, Father. As one body, as one church, as a community of faith that leans on You and each other ever day, we offer the following...

Our father, who art in Heaven...
...forever.

Amen

thank you to everyone that has said such nice things to me since sunday. it felt good and right being back up there. i hope to be invited again soon.