ATTENTION: This post will contain many, many air quotes...
it has come to my attention (i love that phrase. "it has come to my attention". that usually means someone is bothered with me but has passed that being bothered on to me through someone else.) that some of my remarks made here (see comment #7 on my post from October 28) have drawn the "concern" of a few "folks". let's go ahead and put this out here one more time. this is MY journal. MY thoughts. MY commentary on what i think about the world and my world. those that received an invitation to my thoughts if they were interested in reading them were made aware of this very fact in post number one. secondly, i am having a hard time understanding the "concern" that may be necessary from what has been published thus far. is it because i was hard on HUMC? maybe. but, i have always believed that the things/persons you love the most you have the right to be most critical of. why? because in most cases, your passion for said things/persons is going to motivate you to make those things/persons better. case in point...for many, many years i have "loved" HUMC, most especially the last six when i poured every ounce of my being into her, therefore my "concerns" for the church were well documented. moving on, are the outward "concerns" due to "impressionable" eyes that may be sharing in my giving HUMC a hard time? hmm... i have to believe that those that happen upon this journal (or harry potter, or the bible, or their history book) have the mental capacity to take something in without it somehow, subconciously, leading them to brainwashed reactions toward the church. if this "concern" is for "them", treat them as i always treated them, as young adults with minds of their own. moving on, are the "concerned" bothered, themselves, with what they have read? if so, you may choose not to read this journal in the same way you choose what movies you watch, what restaurants you patronize, and what network cartoons on sunday nights on fox you choose to avoid. easy as that. moving on, are the "concerned" in question concerned (no quotes) with/for me? that's silly...
concern comes in many flavors, doesn't it? there's genuine, heartfelt concern for another's physical and/or emotional well-being. in that sense, i am concerned for my brother brian who is currently rehabbing in pompano beach, fl (note: i am very proud of you, brian). after that, there's varying levels of "concern", ranging from innocent intrigue to obsessive intrigue, the degree determined by how one lets that "concern"affect his/her own life and business. i am "concerned" that my president is so silly that he makes himself an easy target for jon stewart each and every night. that "concern" doesn't drive me away from the country, though. in the grand scheme of the ministry of Huffman United Methodist Church, what should it really matter what a former youth director thinks about the cancellation of a Halloween carnival? if this is truly reason for "concern", i think that is silly too.
if you "folks" are "concerned", my e-mail is available via this journal. you probably are aware of how to contact me or sarah via phone. my cell phone number is not a secret. if there is truly reason for "concern", let me know.
if not, then for your peace of mind, as it regards this journal and the thoughts in my head, take the blue pill, guys and girls. take the blue pill.
11 comments:
So I hears the softball team got a big trophy.
i agree about the journal is mine thing. I had people approach me about things that i had said in mine (these were grown people too, who had no business in my business) I mean obviously i was/am putting things for the whole world to see, but they used what i said in MY journal against me. it's frustrating.
in my opinion the "concerned" need to concentrate on the true concerns within the church. say the youth group for example, it's definately not what it used to be. or the problems that lie within the church as a whole. there are reasons many people, including myself, don't come too often. you are 110% correct. this is your journal and you can say whatever the fuck you want to say (oops, i guess it's my turn to take the shit, bring it on!).
i love you and i think you are wonderful. i am very excited you have decided to journal and i can't wait for what is yet to come! keep on writing.
kevin, i am equally outraged by this new level of bullshit, and i don't even have a stake in HUMC. but as someone who does have a stake in a local church as a staff member, i believe that there is something SERIOUSLY wrong with the church.
hang in there, and fuck the naysayers, cause they don't mean a thing.
Do you think that our anger at the "concerned" is stopping us from seeing that there might be a problem here? Change sucks, but it did freakin' happen.
whose anger? a problem where? what change? did they reschedule the halloween carnival? i must have missed that. my bad. no more anger here. thank you, anonymous. where have you been all this time? to think, i could have circumvented all of my frustration by realizing the key point...that change sucks. brilliant.
You don't have to be so mean to me? I was trying to say that all the change at youth happened as you left us. I mean, the halloween stuff just sucks. But I just feel like anger isn't getting us anywhere at youth. It's like holding us back, I think.
if you picked up anger in my response, it was probably pointed at your anonymity (which i LOATHE) moreso than your words. if you would like to join the conversation with your name, then the sarcasm will be turned off. if not, though, sorry. if the youth department is causing you concern, i am sorry for that, but i doubt i will ever comment on that here. i knew, leaving, that the group would be taken in a new direction.
so, to your point, anonymous, i was not commenting and probably will not comment here about the youth program. but do i think anger inspires motivation? yes. do i think anger and hurt can be redirected into something positive? absolutely. if you have an issue in your youth group that you feel like is holding the group back, say it out loud instead of worrying about it here without your name attached. i promise that will be more productive.
I'm afraid to put my name on your blog. People will treat me different if I say what I really feel inside. I think that people are so divided right now. Like there's no room in the middle. Like President Bush you're either with us or your against us.
Kevin, this is your blog. But the more that you make fun of the church older kids in our youth group just gets more depressed about it. Even if it's your blog, how is that helpful?
if you are truly afraid to name yourself and you want to really talk, then e-mail me.
i do think more is made of the perceived "division" than there really is. whether people miss me or love jeremy and celebrate my not being there or both doesn't matter. if people are there, then they want what's best for the group they are actively choosing to be involved in.
and this will be my final point made in response to this half-anonymous conversation. the older kids should be depressed. the adults should be. the current state of Huffman is no different than many, many churches. and if people like you, who obviously care, stay anonymous then things will stay the same. i think huffman has become a sad, perverted, corrupted parody of the church that jesus envisions for us. i felt this way for the vast majority of the time i was serving Huffman, and being away in the ministry that I currently serve only helps me see it more clearly. i, like you, chose not to voice my displeasure most of the time. when and if i tried to take a baby step, it was usually frowned upon by the vocal majority/minority (i am not sure which). and again, let me emphasize this in not a problem that only HUMC suffers from. most established churches do.
to you and to all, i choose not to hold my tongue anymore. this, my journal, is another baby step, but this is my voice. "how is that helpful?" in the long run, it will help me, and i guaran-damn-tee you that i will return the favor by helping as many others as i can.
never be afraid to say your name.
Isn't there an old saying that goes something like, "Let the concerned bury the concerned"?
Post a Comment